Teaching Stranger Danger

Teaching stranger danger has become more common in recent years. Protecting children from those people who would mean them harm is a priority, but parents and other adults need to be sure they are giving children the right information.

Children are more likely to be harmed by someone they know.

A stranger is someone your child doesn't know, but children need to understand that not all strangers present a threat to them. They are more likely to be harmed by someone they know and trust, rather than a person that is unfamiliar to them. When you are teaching stranger danger, you need to explain this fact to your children.

Start by setting out a certain scenario to the child and ask him or her what they would do in that situation. Then wait for the child to answer. Based on what they say, you can either confirm that they are on the right track or offer some alternate suggestions.

Be sure to cover what to do if a stranger attempts to abduct your child, as well as situations where someone they know is making them feel uncomfortable. Explain to your child that you will listen to them if they want to talk to you about something and that you are there to help. Feelings of shame or guilt or the fear that they will not be believed may keep children from reporting incidents of abuse.

Another topic that needs to be covered when you are talking about stranger danger with children is that some strangers can be trusted. Teach them that if they need help, that some people are safe to approach:

• Police officers
• Security guards
• Teachers
• Store employees
• Firefighters

Here are some suggestions to keep in mind when teaching stranger danger to your children:

• Stay together when out in public.

Teach your child that they should walk with a buddy or a group of friends when going to and from school. They should stick to a specific route and not take short cuts.

• Tell someone where you are going and when you will be home.

This is a good idea for children and adults. Letting someone know where you will be and how long you will be out means that if don't return home on time, someone will start looking for you.

• 'If you are approached by someone in a car, avoid getting too close.

Teach your children to stay at least arm's length back if someone driving a vehicle approaches them. If they feel that they are being followed by someone in a car, they can turn and start walking in the other direction. (It will take some time for the driver to turn around.) This will give the child some time to get away.

• If someone attempts to abduct you, make noise.

Do anything you can think of to draw attention to yourself. Yell, scream, kick - hit, whatever it takes. Call for help, shout that this person is not your mother or father, or yell Fire!

Trust your instincts. If something doesn't feel right, then get out of the situation as soon as you can. Go home, to a trusted neighbor's house, or to a public place to get help. This suggestion can be difficult for adults as well. We tend to ignore or discount our own personal radar about people and things that are happening around us. It's far better to back away from something that might be dangerous and possibly be a bit embarrassed than to ignore our gut instincts and have something far worse happen.

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